Humans, we crave acceptance. We desire to fit in. No, there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to belong. But when it starts consuming you, at the end of it all, are you still yourself? Or are you defined by the people around you?
There is a very fine line between doing something because you love it, or doing something because you love you doing it. Or worse, because other love you for doing it. Very often, we get caught up by the approval of others. We mistake the temporal rush of exhilaration we get from compliments and achievement, for joy of doing something. Maybe you sing very well, and everyone says so. You feel proud of yourself for that. You love blushing when people compliment your voice, your passion. But underneath it all, there may lie a subdued voice inside you, like that annoying itch at the back of your throat that you can't seem to ever soothe, whispering softly that you would be happier painting the backdrops instead of hogging center-stage.
Dress for yourself, not because it is 'in' right now. Not because you want to turn heads, to make people envious and wish that they were you. There is no need to impress anyone if it comes at the cost of yourself. We are individuals, not a flock of uniform sheep. Society has conditioned so many of us into robots, machines without unique identity, drones without personality, androids without feelings. Almost everything in this life can be found in the virtual world of bright screens and clicking sounds. Yes, technology is a beautiful thing, and I do agree that I wouldn't be able to function normally if it were to be taken away from us. But how often do we take a break from the flashing lights and beeping tones to focus on what is in right in front of us and who we really are? And this does not just apply to taking a break from media, but also taking a step back from the expectations that we try so hard to live up to? Who are we, when everything is stripped off? What is left of us, without the perception of others?
Remember, don't do something because that's what everyone tells you you're good at it, that it's so 'you'. Do it because you want to, because you love it.
Most of us can't force ourselves to do something we don't want to, and still find joy in it. We were made by our Creator to be different. We were given different gifts. We are individuals for a reason: to make a mark on this world that no one else can make in our places, because there is no one like any of us. No one.
But yes, it's hard. It's scary to step out, to stand up for who you are when society's scrutiny seems to be burning holes into the back of your neck. But, who cares? Let them judge. It just proves how shallow they are.
Societal norms are often in the form of: "Put on these chains, and you can live freely." And in the process of chasing our desires, we more often than not fall into the clutches of society's expectations of us. I believe that it is time for us to take a look at ourselves, our lives, and ask: "Who am I, really?" and "What makes up my identity?". Then, take courage, and break out of the mold that others (and society) has set for you.
But of course, an all-important disclaimer: break the mold in right way. Please don't twist these words to suit your own motives. Yes, you have the right to choose the course of your life, but ethics and virtues are not to be compromised in the search for identity. Some of you may question: what if those ethics and virtues are just alternate figments of societal norms? But I believe that we can all know, at the least, deep inside, where that line has to be drawn. For your identity should be the brightest light of all, and you won't go wrong.
With that said, listen to yourself. Be yourself.
Live your life.
And life, will be very beautiful indeed.
What you can or cannot do isn't determined by someone else.
You are beautiful, as who you are, as who our Creator has made you to be. So, heads up, my friends.
Stand tall, stand strong.
Love,
eunice.